Mean What You Say & Say What You Mean

This has been on my heart for some time now, with all of the social media out there. It really bothers me when people ask for certain things from others before making sure that they themselves are together. What do I mean by this?
I see a lot of men claiming they're looking for a "Proverbs 31 Woman", but 1. they probably haven't even read the whole chapter, and 2. they flirt, message and entertain EVERY single girl on social networks whose mind seems to be set on everything but that scripture. Likewise, I see women who constantly speak about how they want a "Man after God's own Heart", yet they find it acceptable to post half naked pics just to get a few likes and diminish their own worth.

All I'm saying is, what kind of virtuous woman would be interested in a guy claiming to be a child of God, but carrying himself like he's still "in the world"? And what kind of man of God would be looking for a lady that showcases what should be reserved for her husband off for a few likes? (side note: ladies, you can't call dudes "thirsty" if you're intentionally giving him something to thirst after. You knew when you put that outfit on what was going to happen...but you cute though! *side eye* I'm sure some of those guys would love to come at you in a respectable manner, but how can they when you don't even respect yourself?? YOU set the standard for what kind of respect you receive! Set the standard high and they'll have no choice but to reach it. If they're incapable of reaching it, then they're not for you).

I just really want people to step up and take ownership of their actions. If you want to chase skirts and flirt with every single girl you meet, then be real and say that. If you really just want a Church boy (and I use that term loosely) and someone who respects you juuust enough to not put his hands on you, then say that. Don't claim you want all of these certain qualities that you yourself aren't exuding in return, just because it seems like the right thing to say. "A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of." -Luke 6:45. So, if every other word you say is a curse word, it's because that's what's in your heart. If you feel the need to solicit guys over to your house late at night just to "chill", it shows a bigger problem within your heart. If you feel the need to comment on every girls picture up and down your newsfeed, it shows what's really in your heart. There's absolutely nothing wrong with a genuine compliment, but you know when you type it where your heart is at.

Just like you can recognize a tree by its fruits (Matthew 7:20) you can recognize a person by their actions. I've learned to not listen so much as to what people tell me, but to what they show me. You can't say that you're an orange tree but you're steady producing apples. That doesn't make any sense. Be real with yourself. Be real with the Lord. Be real with others. God can't change you if you won't even admit that you need to change. I don't care how much someone loves you, the only way they will change is through Christ. I once heard "the only way we can change someone is if they're in diapers" and that is so true. I've talked to guys before who told me that they wanted to change/develop a deeper relationship with God, etc. and I believed them; so I helped them. Ironically, after we stopped talking, I stopped seeing the fruits of those words. I'm not saying that they were lying, because they could have very well been speaking truthfully. I do believe, however, that their want for change was temporary and not truly from the heart. How do I know? When our season ended, so did their eagerness to change.

God is gracious in this, He watches the very people He created claim to be of Him, but act in ways that are contrary to Him. Even still He loves us. That's one of the realest things ever. He gives us time and time again to accept Him into our hearts (the result should be evident in our actions) and allow Him to change us from the inside out. So the good news is that if you could relate to anything in this post, He STILL loves you. He STILL wants your heart. And He can STILL change it to resemble His. All you have to do is let Him in. So, are you going to keep claiming to be an orange tree while producing apples or are you going to allow Him to uproot you from within so that all others hear and see is what's really supposed to be there? You choose.